The Weeklyish Rant - Abolishing the Penny

Now for another new segment called...Weeklish Rant. Every week (or so, hence the "ish") I'll post a rant or something comparable for everyone to argue against (or agree with, but that's not nearly as fun is it?) . Any comments absolutely must have a arguable position to them, that way the discussion cuts to the chase. This will hold true for most of the things I post on this blog. So everyone enjoy The Weeklyish Rant.
It came to my attention a few years ago that Congress had proposed a bill to abolish the penny, and I don't mean just not making them anymore. They wouldn't be accepted as currency anymore. What kind of petty bullshit is that? Sure, making the penny costs more than its value in our currency, but who gives a damn? When you consider that the government just basically threw away 700 billion dollars on a bailout that did nothing but encourage the paranoia that the economy is falling apart, a few million here and there is fairly inconsequential, especially when it comes to protecting such a culturally important coin. "See a penny, pick it up, and all day long you'll have good luck." "A penny saved is a penny earned." "Penny for your thoughts." "A penny is a lot of money, if you have not got a penny." The list of wonderful quotes goes on and on. Kids are taught at a very young age to save their pennies. Nickels are no fun, so kids will effectively become bored with the concept of saving and building wealth, thereby perpetuating the problems with the economy for years.
Even going beyond all of this intangible argument, getting rid of the penny is still crap. What happens when stores can't charge any price that where the cents doesn't end in a five or a zero? They'll just round their prices up to accomodate for it. Getting rid of the penny would effectively instill a nationwide two-and-a-half cent tax on every single purchase, not to mention price increases/decreases would be more drastic, putting pressure on both the consumer and business owners.
My last argument concerns the luck and wishes of this nation. Picking a penny heads-up is a sure way to keep yourself on the positive side of luck. And what about wishes? What are we going to throw into the wishing well for our wishes if there are no pennies? Anything silver is bad luck, and cats really don't like to be thrown into wells, so they're out too. The penny is the wonderfully capitalistic American version of the Leprechaun, and we should look to precedent when considering abolishing it. I'm sure you all remember what happened when the Irish abolished leprechauns. They had a potato famine that killed thousands of people! Is this what you want for the U.S.?! A lack of french fries and assumedly thousands of people commiting suicide because of it?! Well, I for one, say no! Protect the penny so we can keep our spuds!!!